Unfinished Business

So, the awesome Sarah Lynn from Postcards From Far Away has tagged me in a photo meme and given me an award. I haven't yet written a post on either of these things so I thought I'd finally return the favor! (And plus, it's Halloween and I have nothing to write about this holiday)

Photo Meme
Rules:
1. Go to the first photo album on your computer.
2. Go to the 10th picture.
3. Post the picture and tell a story about it.
4. Tag 5 more people and let them know


So, I had to go to my third photo album since my first two didn't have 10 pictures in them. This is a photo of my nephew at 8 months old. My mom and I had stopped by my brother's apartment to spend some time with this butterball. I took him in his room when he was getting fussy and found this hat and it was such a photo op! I had to take a picture! How cute is he in this hat? I took this photo on my cell phone and kept it as my screensaver for months.

Five people to tag: Amber, Amy, Issa, Courtney, and Cassie

Award!

For this one, I have questions to answer. I'll try to be somewhat interesting:
1.Where is your cell phone? It's in my wallet in the living room.
2.Your hair? It's in a messy, lopsided ponytail. And my bangs are at the stage where they're too long to wear as bangs but too short to pull back with my ponytail so currently, they are annoying me to no end!
3. Your mother? My best friend and biggest support system.
4. Your father? Next month will mark 2 years I haven't spoken to/seen him. I have no idea where he is now, or if he's even alive.
5. Your favorite food? Publix subs rock my world! I would choose them over "fine food" any day! 6. Your dream last night? I had this really crazy dream that I had this class that I never attended. I went for the first 3 classes and then stopped going until the end of the semester. It felt so real that when I woke up, I reminded myself that it was just a dream and that I have attended that class the whole semester - before realizing I don't even have that class!
7. Your favorite drink? Coke rules my life.
8. Your dream/goal? Become a published author, fall in love, get married, have some babies.
9. What room are you in? My bedroom.
10. Your hobby? Just one? Um...I'll go with blogging.
11. Your fear? Dying, tragedy.
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Hm...hopefully everything I mentioned in my dreams/goals.
13. Where were you last night? I was at home because I'm COOL like that. I also carved a dreadful-looking pumpkin. Poor thing. He never had a chance.
14. Something you aren't? A teacher. I know because I tried and failed miserably.
15. Muffins? I love them but only blueberry or double chocolate.
16. Wish list item? An iPod Touch. I see one and drool.
17. Where did you grow up? Around these here parts.
18. Last thing you did? Well, I just came back from a Target shopping trip. Fun, fun.
19. What are you wearing? Lounge pants and a t-shirt. I'm thinking of putting on some white pants and my Peyton Manning jersey to be Peyton Manning for Halloween. Weird.
20. Your TV? It's off.
21. Your pets? Dutch, my mini-daschund who is sleeping beside me. He's going to be a pumpkin for Halloween!
22. Your friends? I don't have many of those and yesterday I realized why I don't want any. It's just easier to be acquaintances and less hurtful.
24. Your mood? Happy.
25. Missing someone? Always.
26. Vehicle? Well, I drive a Mitsubishi Lancer that is in my mom's name and she pays for. Sometimes, I even let her drive it herself!
27. Something you're not wearing? Lipstick.
28. Your favorite store? Clothing-wise, Kohls. But Target fulfills all my other needs.
29. Your favorite color? Green.
30. When was the last time you laughed? Sometime today.
31. Last time you cried? I was so close to crying twice at work yesterday. People suck.
32. Your best friend? My best friend is my mom and yes, you should be jealous.
33. One place that I go over and over? Publix. I'm there almost every, single day.
34. One person who emails me regularly? Disqus?
35. Favorite place to eat? Carrabba's.

Two people to pass on this award: Samantha and Christina

As If I'm Not Busy Enough...

I did something last weekend that I think I may end up regretting in a few weeks. Or maybe in a few days.

I signed up for NaNoWriMo, which runs for the whole month of November. NaNoWriMo challenges real and wannabe novelists alike to write 50,000 words in one month.

Five.

Thousand.

Words.

What have I gotten myself into? Do I not have enough on my plate with work and school and blogging and projects and reality television and sleep? I guess not.

For the past year or so, I've had a specific novel idea in my head. I haven't worked too hard on it because I don't have a lot of focus when it comes to novel writing. First of all, I've never done it. I've written outlines and I love writing about my characters. But I've never taken the final step to begin writing. It's such a big step. And I think I'm terrified of failing.

But I think NaNoWriMo will be the kick in the pants I need. I need to stop stalling and making excuses. I need to just sit down and WRITE! While I am a journalism major currently and I like the idea of working at a magazine, my number one dream is to become a novelist. And I want to be successful at it. But life has gotten so busy for me that I've put all writing by the wayside. I'm not even developing outlines for stories I'll never write right now! And that, my dear blog readers, is crazy talk.

So while I'm nervous and scared about NaNoWriMo, I'm also very, very excited. It boils down to writing 1,700 words a day. It's not about writing anything publishable. It's going to be very raw and very rough. It's just about writing. And I need to just start writing.

Anyone else trying out NaNoWriMo? Has anyone tried it before? Thoughts?

Current Debates In My Head

I've had some debates rolling around in my head lately. Since I'm the worst decision maker to ever live, I keep going from one side to the other over and over again. I can't make up my mind! So I thought about throwing these ideas out and see if any blog readers can help me! Pretty please?

Debate #1: Contacts v. Glasses
I started wearing glasses in 4th grade. It was a welcome relief to not have to squint at the board in school and to sit next to my friends again as I had to move to the front of the class while waiting to get into an appointment. Since I was 10, my eyesight has steadily gotten worse and worse. I think I'm just one step above blind right now. I decided to make the switch to contacts in 10th grade. And anyone who has switched over knows of those glorious first few weeks of learning how to put contacts in your eyes. There's really a science to it. It was especially fun to wake your mother up at 5:30 a.m. because you lost a contact on the floor and need her to help you. At that time, she's not really in a helping mood. But I eventually got the hang of it and never looked back! I kept my old, crappy glasses for a few years until I realized how they were so outdated that they weren't much help as back-ups. So, two years ago, I bought the glasses I have now. I love them and think I look super-cute in them. I still used contacts up until July when I decided I needed to take a break from them for a while. So I took them out, put them in their case, and fumbled through my medicine cabinet for contact solution. Found the bottle - empty. And I also was out of contacts completely. At this time, we were also dirt poor so we couldn't afford $70 for a new box of contacts. (I'm lucky and both of my eyes are the same prescription!) Since July, I've been wearing my glasses. And I like them. They don't bother me. But I don't have prescription sunglasses so I've been without any type of sun protection when I go outside. I hate it when I'm driving, especially since I'm out of work at 1 p.m. and the sun is terrible at that time. So I've been thinking about going back to contacts but I'm not sure. I think I look better with glasses. I don't know. If I kept my glasses, I would definitely buy some prescription sunglasses because I've been miserable without them! What do you think? Do I look better with contacts or glasses? (And you can't say neither!) If you wear one or the other, what are your thoughts?

Debate #2: Long hair v. Short hair
I've had both. I won't go into the details throughout elementary, middle, and high school but I did have long hair for most of high school and then decided I needed a change during my freshman year of college. I went from long and blonde to short and dark brown. I felt so happy about it! It was my first time ever coloring my hair and it was fun. I loved the change! Since then, I've tried out other types of short hair, even going as short as the Victoria Beckham look. It was really cute but took a lot of work to get it to look perfect every day. So I let it grow out and haven't done much since there. I got bangs and have been growing out my hair. I love my long hair but I also love short hair. They both work for me, I think. I'm currently growing out my bangs because bangs really annoy me, especially side bangs. But then the way my face is shaped, I think bangs soften up my face a lot. What do you think? Short hair or long hair? Bangs or no bangs? What works for you?

Debate #3: SparkPeople v. Weight Watchers
As with the previous two debates, I've tried out both these programs. When I was a freshman in college, I used SparkPeople during my spring semester and it worked out great! I woke up early to go to the gym, ate Subway every day, and never felt deprived. I managed to lose 10 pounds that semester but when I came back home, I started Weight Watchers. And I managed to lose 10 more pounds that summer but then my weight kind of stalled. I wasn't following the program like I should have, I wasn't exercising as much as I needed to, and I was just being lazy. So I keep fluctuating between the two. They both worked for me. I feel like there's more of a community within WW, probably because I don't get involved in SP as much as I should. If I do go back to WW, I'm probably not going to go back to my meeting. I went with my mom and I feel that if I go back, I need to do this for me and only me, not ride on my mom's weightloss wagon. I found a meeting on Thursday at 4:30 which would work out perfectly with my schedule. So I'm definitely leaning towards WW. Thoughts?

I would love, love, love to hear your thoughts on any of these "issues"! Thanks!

I Remember...

My grandma is the quintessential grandmother. She is loving, sweet, and my #1 fan. She always takes my sides in debates between my mother and I. She's an amazing woman of God and I just wish I had half her faith. She raised 6 kids and is currently raising her 14-year-old twin granddaughters, which is something I do not envy her on. My grandma is an amazing lady and I have so many sweet memories with her.

I remember marshmellow fluff and peanut butter on crackers. I remember late night chats, sipping hot chocolate for me and hot tea for her. I remember having special Sundays with my grandparents when I would get to spend the hours between morning and night church with them and only them. I remember playing grocery store, where she would get out Pops' printing calculator. We would label prices for all the food and then go to town buying from the "store". I remember seeing her beaming face at all of my graduations and big events. I remember laughter, tears, inspiration, love. I remember support, gentleness, sweetness, and heart.

I remember finding out on Tuesday, May 6th at work that my grandma was in the hospital, scheduled to have surgery to have her appendix removed. I remember finding out later in the day that, after a bevy of tests, the doctors had realized it wasn't her appendix but a tumor growing in her colon. I remember sitting in the waiting room during her surgery the next day. I remember finding out that the tumor had been removed but it was malignant. I remember being in the room when my mom told her she had cancer. I remember the peace I felt, knowing cancer could not keep my grandma down. I remember seeing my grandma lose pound after pound, transforming her from my plump and soft grandma to a frail woman I barely recognized. I remember loving how her spirit never changed - she relentlessly pursued after God. I remember the utter relief I felt when a PET scan revealed no cancer in her body on October 14. I remember being the one to serve my grandma, instead her serving me (like she had every holiday before), on Christmas Day, just one day after she finished her last round of chemotherapy.

I remember seeing my grandma transform, slowly, back into the woman I used to know. I remember the first time she went out to a restaurant since starting her treatment. I remember her strength coming back and her faith stronger than ever.

---

My grandma had a PET scan in March, which came back clean. She just had another PET scan, one year after her first one, last Thursday. This whole week, I have prayed and prayed for good results. And they were! My grandma, my amazing, beautiful, inspiring grandmother, has been cancer-free for one entire year. I can't tell you how awesome and wonderful this news is!

It's amazing that my grandma, in her late 60's, managed to beat Stage IV colon cancer! I'm sure it felt like a death sentence for her, but I had this all-encompassing peace that my grandma would beat cancer. She is such an integral part of our family that I just couldn't imagine God taking her away from us. She's way too important to us. She's way too important to me.

Flab to Fab: Back On Track

So...I've taken a break from Flab to Fab. (Did you notice? I haven't written a post since September 17...)

There were a lot of factors at play: moving, being poor, no motivation, etc. Obviously, I'm still seeing this as a diet and not a lifestyle change. I really need to work on this.

For the past 2 weeks, I've tried motivating myself by eating better and exercising. My weeks have gotten so packed with work and school that I never have time to exercise on weekdays. I have been drinking a lot more water and having healthy lunches. It's a start, at least.

But I really want to get serious and start doing things right. So, I made a list of everything I need to do to succeed. Brace yourselves. This is a ground-breaking list! You won't see this anywhere else!

1. Drink more water. Yep...it's no secret that drinking lots o' water is a key ingredient in successful weight loss. It's also not a secret that I hate, hate, hate water. An ice-cold class of Coca-Cola just sounds so much better than water. First of all, Coke has taste. Water does not. But I know I need to really amp up on my water. I do fine at work, now that I've got a fancy-schmancy insulated bottle (from Wal-Mart. Don't judge!). I just need to suck it up and drink water. Plus, I never feel as good drinking soda as I do when I drink water.
2. Exercise. Unlike most diet programs that expound, "No exercise! Eat what you want! Just take this pill and you'll lose 30 pounds in 3 months!," I know that's only temporary. And not good for your health, anyway. Everyone needs to exercise, no matter how fat or skinny you are. My goal would be to exercise 5 days a week but lately, I've been too busy at night to exercise. I really want to get diligent about exercise because as much as I hate it, I feel so awesome afterwards! I just wish I loved it and looked forward to working out. But that's never, ever going to happen.
3. Get 3 square meals a day. Another ground-breaking discovery right here. I usually get 2 good meals (lunch and dinner) and tons of calorie-killing snacks in between. I don't eat breakfast. First of all, I have to be at work super early so I don't have time to eat before work. Secondly, I don't have much of an opportunity to eat breakfast at work, since I work in a preschool. Of course, this may be just an excuse, since we do serve breakfast and I could always sit down and eat my breakfast while the kids are eating. And I really need to cut down on the snacks and make the snacks I do eat healthy. It's a good concept and now let's just see if I can implement it in my everyday life.

So, there you have it. My tips for a healthier life. Pretty great list, huh? I've been using SparkPeople to track my food and exercise because I feel that I really have to do it to be successful. I really don't think it's possible, for me, to be successful losing weight without tracking. Plus, it's a proven method of weight loss.

So, off to another great week of trying to live healthy! I weighed myself tonight and I'm currently at my highest weight yet, which is really scary for me. I feel like I have to be successful this time. I can't keep gaining weight. I have to lose it and be healthy.

So, what are your tips for being healthy? (And no, you can't steal my awesome, inspiring ones!)

I Love...

I think it's time for another I Love... Mondays. I did my first one in August and feel it was time for another one. I'll try to get better at doing these more often. Ideally, every Monday but sometimes life gets in the way of that!

I Love... running.

Actually, I don't. I like the idea of running. And when I see people running, it makes me want to become a runner even more. And those first 30 seconds? Easy as pie. Then the calves start hurting and my breath gets shorter and shorter. And once the stomach cramps start? Forget it. I'm done. But I really, really want to become a runner. I'm not sure I'll ever love it as much as my mom does but the idea of being a runner? Yeah. I love that.

I Love... the holiday season.


I bought my first ever pumpkin Saturday night. I am determined to carve an adorable little pumpkin face in it, eat some pumpkin seeds, and maybe even make some pumpkin bread! I've never done any of those and I'm really excited about it! Alas, I didn't go to a pumpkin patch to buy my pumpkin but I still get all gooey and excited seeing my pumpkin sitting on the counter. He's adorable!

As for the specific holidays, Thanksgiving is my absolute favorite. Lots of delicious food, somewhat interesting football games (I'm annoyed we have to sit through the Lions every. single. year.), and family time. I love when family comes down to visit, even though I always build it up so high in my head and am always disappointed. Still, it's fun and I love it! Soon, we'll be seeing Thanksgiving commercials on TV, followed by Christmas commercials! I can't wait!

I Love... soda.

Ugh. I love this delicious beverage so, so much. I'm thinking it's the carbonation that makes it so yummy but nothing else compares. Honestly, it's better than alcohol to me. I've tried alcohol and it's just plain nasty to me. Since alcoholism runs in my family, I think it's God's way of protecting me from this. Ha. But I really would much rather drink a Coke than a margarita. I'm having such a hard time getting off this stuff. But I really need to!

I Love... shoe shopping.

I've never been much of a shoe girl. Just a few pairs to get me through what few outfits I do have. But everytime I walk into Payless or down the shoe aisle in Target (struggling college student alert!), I really want to become a shoe girl. I found this adorable pair of flats at Target that I really desperately wanted to buy. But I was there only to buy a pair of flip-flops so that's what I did. (Yep...I live in Florida. I buy new flip-flops for the fall/winter.) But I'd really love to build up a shoe collection and start taking some pride in those adorable feet of mine!

I Love... being productive.The weekends are usually my homework days, although it usually takes a backseat to football on Sundays. And I'm usually such a lazybones on Saturday that I sleep in and then spend my day screwing around online. This Saturday, though? I got a whole lot done. A lot of reading and some assignments for school. It felt good.

Your turn: what do you love today?

I Am A Winner!

Stop laughing. I am! The oh-so-lovely Jennifer at Somewhere In Between has graciously given me not 1, not 2...but THREE AWARDS! I'm not even going to begin to explain how long I have been waiting for a blog award. I only recently got involved in reading other blogs and commenting. I've been blogging for a long time (since middle school) but it wasn't until I got comments from Shalay and Nanny that I realized there was this big blogging community out there. And, gosh darnit, I was sick of seeing '0 comments' on my blog posts! So I began to get involved in the blogging community (slowwwwly) and I found out about these awards. I have been anxiously anticipating one for AGES! And now I have one.

And now I must tell you 10 things that I've never told you before. Sigh. OK. I'll do just about anything, short of giving up my virginity, for a blog award. Here goes:

1. I spend my mornings/afternoons working with two-year-olds. It's challenging, fun, and never, ever boring. And I get this special, warm feeling in the pit of my stomach when they say my name. I know it's silly but it makes me feel loved. And they're 2, so they have the cutest ways of saying my name, such as Stephmamy, Steppy, Stetty, Daffy, Teffy, etc.

2. I'm weird about dates. There are certain dates that I just don't like. For example, I was extremely excited when I found out my nephew would be born on September 25. That, for me, is a nice date. Days I'm not too keen on are: 1, 6, 12, 15, 19, 20, 22, 23, 26, 27, and 29. And I don't like to blog on those dates. I'm not even kidding you. It's just this weird thing I have about those days. (And I'm really, really sorry if I offended anyone with this, especially if you were born on one of those days! I'm just a weirdo.)

3. When I'm in the car with someone, I never sing along to what's on the radio. But when I'm alone, I can't help but sing along to every song I hear. I laugh at people when I see them singing and dancing along in their cars...yet I do the exact same thing. I must look like a freak.

4. Sometimes, I wonder if I'm curious enough to be a reporter. I'm more interested in magazine writing but who knows where I'll end up when I graduate! I don't always know the right questions to ask and frankly, sometimes, I don't really care. I'm trying to dig deeper into my own self and become more of an inquiring mind...but it's hard.

5. The Mitsubishi Lancer that Mom and I "share" now is my first-ever "new" car my family has ever had. We've had our fair share of embarrassing cars. We had to drive the church van for a while, which was good for taking a nap in but not fun to show up to school in. Then there was the car that looked like sharp turn would make the frame fall off. We had to use pliers to get the wipers to work and I never let Mom pick me up at school in it. I would rather walk to another place and have her pick me up there. And then there was my great-grandma's car. My grandma drove me to school in it and would always park right in front. This car was made in the 1970's with a hood that looked like it was 10 miles long. So...I love this Lancer.

6. I really wish I had the courage to get short, short hair. Halle Berry short. I wish I could pull it off. Because, honestly, as much as I love the look of long hair...I hate the maintenance. I can never keep it down for very long. And if I do manage to keep my hair down for a whole day, it goes right up into the ponytail the minute I get home.

7. I'm not really a Steph. I've always been a Stephany. The only person who calls me Steph, really, is my brother. And sometimes I get annoyed with people who don't really know me calling me Steph. When I lived in hell (a.k.a. the dorm), my roommate had a boyfriend who called me Steph. And I just wanted to slap him across the face everytime he did. Only people I know really, really well get to call me Steph. And people I like.

8. I'm a bookworm, through and through. Ever since I've learned to read, I've had a book. I'm never not reading something. I really get sad when I hear of people who either don't like to read (something I don't understand AT ALL) or people who like to read and don't have time to read. I really hope that never happens to me.

9. I'm very critical of my waiter/waitress at a restaurant. Really, I'm just asking for them to do their job. Take yesterday, for example. At Carrabba's, my waiter pushed only the most expensive items on the menu. (OK, I can understand this a little.) Then when I asked him (a la Biggest Loser) how they cook the chicken, he told me, "We grill it with seasoning." Um, duh. I'm not an idiot - I know this. I want to know what's in the seasoning. Loser. And when I inquired more, he was still very obtuse about it. Then, near the end of my meal, he came by and just took my plate from me! My drink had been empty for a good while and he didn't even ask if I was finished. Granted, I just had some broccoli leftover but still...ask me first! Needless to say, his tip was quite low. Deservedly so.

10. When I was younger, my favorite color was purple. Not because I particularly liked the color...but because I wanted to be "different." All the girls I knew liked pink. I liked purple. Man, I was such a rebel!

I'm picking 5 bloggers that I adore to pass these awards onto. Have fun!

Nanny

Kait

Samantha

Issa
Courtney

Operation: Move

It's been over a week since I last updated, thanks to no Internet connection at the new apartment. I found this out on Saturday, cried about it a little (I'm serious), and moved on. I've been able to get any homework I need to get done when I'm at school and today I woke up early to take my mom to work and then head over to Panera Bread to work on more homework. Yay, me.

And since I'm finished with my homework and it's not even 9:30 a.m., I thought a blog post was in order.

Mom and I spent Friday, Saturday, and Sunday moving. We moved the majority of our boxes on Friday, mostly cleaned the old apartment on Saturday, and moved the rest of it on Sunday. On Sunday, my brother also helped move the big stuff. He has a big truck and big muscles. Big muscles, as in, he can carry a couch all by himself. By himself! Mom and I, together, couldn't even carry our 28-inch TV. (Granted, it's not one of those fancy-shmancy flat screens but a big, black, clunky one.) His help was greatly appreciated.

The apartment is great, we love it! There are so many pluses to this new place. Mainly, our financial situation is going to look a LOT better as our rent will be a LOT cheaper. We have an amazing view, a fantastic apartment manager, and I have a ceiling fan in my room! For some reason, this excites me greatly.

The place is a lot smaller than our old apartment but we didn't use half the space of the old one. The appliances are a little older but we can deal. We also don't have a washer/dryer in our unit. The last time we had to use a laundromat, I was in middle school. Luckily, our laundry room is just a few steps from our apartment so it's not too bad. (Can you tell I'm a bit of a glass-half-full type of girl?)

All in all, I'm pretty happy. I'll be even happier when we have Internet, better cable, and MONEY! Mom and I will be sitting down sometime this weekend and working out our budget. We need to get caught up on all our credit card bills and also start saving money. I've had $1.00 in my savings account for 3 years now. It'd be nice to get in the double digits, at least.

The mantra for this week is that it's going to get better. Things are tough right now but they will get better. We're both so happy with the decision we made and I can't wait for the day my mom can put in her two week's notice at her second job! (I'm shooting for March!)